Book Review: Small in Real Life-Stories by Kelly Sather

Warm, sunny weather, sandy beaches, and the glitz and glamour of Hollywood. These may be a few things you conjure up when you think of Southern California. But in Kelly Sather’s award-winning collection of stories, Small in Real Life, she tells tales that show a much more gritty reality of the Golden State. Some of the characters in Small in Real Life work in show business, and others are wannabes drawn to the promise of fame and fortune of Hollywood. And other characters are living lives far from those tired, yet true tropes of California. And all of them are an interesting narrative to tell.

Small in Real Life starts out strong with The Spaniard. Jenny is just about to turn sixteen when she gets sick at school. Nobody is able to reach her parents, so she is given bus fare and goes back home via the RTD. Yes, Los Angeles has public transportation. When Jenny gets home a strange man is there with her mother. Due to this man’s European accent, Jenny deems him The Spaniard. Why is this man in their house? Why is Jenny’s mother being so coy? Is The Spaniard and her mother having an affair? Jenny infers that they are, and she believes she can blackmail her mother into buying her a car for her upcoming 16th birthday, and if not, Jenny will tattle to her father about her mother’s dalliance with The Spaniard. But Jenny’s mother remains unfazed. Will this transgression be the end of Jenny’s parents’ marriage?

Betrayal is also a theme in Handbag Parade. Stephanie and Carol often meet at the home of their mutual friend, Gia. Gia is in the last throes of ALS; her tragic death is imminent. All three of them met early in their careers working low-level jobs at a Hollywood agency. Not one of them became an agent, but Gia found the most success of them all, and now she’s trapped in a frozen body. Stephanie begins to steal Gia’s collection of high end designer hand bags, and thusly, blames Gia’s nurse, Esme, for the thievery, putting Esme’s vocation on the line. Stephanie betrays a friend and bears false witness against an innocent woman. Handbag Parade show truly conveys how friendship can tragically lead to heartbreak and disloyalty.

In God’s Work an LA judge somehow ends up on a date with a failed actress turned make-up artist. The way this judge describes this woman you can tell he thinks she’s beneath him. He speaks disdainfully of her low-cut sweater and clumped up mascara. But is this an actual date or something quite else when the judge makes a startling confession, and somehow thinks him being a judge may be in her favor. But will it?

So many of the stories that make up Small In Real Life are gripping portraying people from all walks of life going through their day to day activities in the Golden State. Some get close to the glittering images Hollywood promises, but never quite grab that brass ring. Others are in the gallows. And then there are those who revel in the underbelly.

Small In Real Life made me think of the Hollywood sign. It looms over the land in large capital letters. It seems to promise fame and fortune and glamour. But closer and you’ll probably see decay, graffiti, and litter strewn about showing the true messiness and disappointment of real life.

Book Review: What About Men?-A Feminist Answers the Question by Caitlin Moran

Journalist, novelist, a former teen-age music critic, Caitlin Moran has been writing about the female experience for years. A self-described feminist, Moran has covered all things girls and women in both her novels and books of collected essays. However, there is one question Moran has been asked by her mostly female audience. That question? “What about men?” For the longest time, Moran has put off answering the question. It wasn’t until her daughters were asking the very same question that Moran was inspired to ask “what about men?’ herself and she decided to do some homework resulting into her latest book, What About Men: A Feminist Answers the Question.

In several unique chapters, Moran covers men and various topics. These include everything from men as young boys to old age. She takes a look at the bodies of men (including their private parts), men’s clothing, the conversations amongst men, and how they view sex and porn. She also looks at the way men talk to women and friendships amongst men. She looks at men through the lens of fatherhood and how men deal with illness. And she also goes down a treacherous path of men and misogyny in the scary world of the on-line manosphere.

To find out the inner-workings of all things men, Moran first turned to her inner-circle, including her husband, Pete. Now, these men are not exactly a diverse group. Like Moran herself, they are mainly white, cis, heterosexual, middle-aged, and middle class. But you’ve got to start somewhere, right?

She asks these men about growing up, what they talk about (or don’t talk about) when they chat amongst in a men-only group, their attitudes about sex and pornography, and their opinions on everything from the clothes they wear to why they neglect their health. And she gets some very interesting answers. For instance, she finds out why men don’t talk about their penises whereas some women will wax on about their vaginas post-birth.

One frightening aspect of the world of men today, is the world of the manosphere. For the uninitiated, the manosphere (which can be found all over the internet) is a cesspool of misogynistic men who see women as servants and cum dumpsters. They are truly threatened by any woman assets herself, is educated, and lives for anything that isn’t in service of a man. Probably the most famous of these knuckle-draggers, is MMA fighter, Andrew Tate. Tate has horrifying views on women, rape, and relationships. And he’s currently under investigation for sex trafficking. However, Tate does have a huge following, especially amongst very confused Gen Z men. Moran, too, is horrified by Tate, but tries to get an inkling of why some young men might be drawn to such a divisive figure. And on a personal note, Tate isn’t exactly the tough guy he purports to be. He actually blocked me on Twitter for saying he has no chin. But let’s go further.

On the issue of men and pornography, a young man shares his tale with Moran of his addiction to porn and how it negatively affected him when it came to dating and relationships. This could be a good warning that not all porn is completely harmless. Your heart breaks for this young man, and you will be comforted that he’s on the path towards healing.

But not is all lost when it comes to men. Yes, there are horrible examples of toxic masculinity like the aforementioned Andrew Tate. Moran looks into men who are admired for positive masculinity and comes up with names like Keanu Reeves and President Barack Obama. For me, I’d like to add names like the late Paul Newman and professor Neil Shyminsky who I follow on TikTok, and always has excellent counter-arguments to the toxicity of the manosphere.

And just as women are imprisoned by what makes a true woman, men are also locked into tropes of what it makes a true man, and how both men and women need to look past these clichés to be true to oneself. At this point, we’re not really talking about the difficulties of being a man in the 21st century in a way that doesn’t bash women and feminism. These things need to change.

Now admittedly, Moran does not go in very deep in What About Men? She is not an academic or a researcher. If you’re looking for a book that goes more in depth on the topic of men, I highly recommend Susan Faludi’s Stiffed: The Betrayal of American Men. Yes, Faludi, the feminist who wrote the classic Backlash: The War Against Women. And at times, Moran can be a wee bit too snarky and UK-oriented. However, I do commend Moran for actually giving a shit about men and their issues. What About Men? isn’t a perfect book, but it is a start. And I hope it can open up a dialogue about men, what they’re going through, and how we can find understanding and empathy between the sexes.

Retro Review: The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

When the late Sylvia Plath’s novel The Bell Jar was released in 1963, it was considered groundbreaking. It focused on topics quite controversial just over 60 years ago, including ambition in young women in a time when women were supposed to desire only marriage and motherhood and dealing with horrifying mental health issues. Originally published under the name Victoria Lucas, Sylvia’s only novel is still considered a classic in the feminist canon. But how well does The Bell Jar hold up in 2024? I decided to read it and found out for myself.

Meet Esther Greenwood, raised in the Boston suburbs by her widowed mother, Esther is now in college, which is being funded by a wealthy local author. It is the summer of 1953, and Esther has procured an internship with the fictional women’s magazine “Ladies Day” in New York City. Though Esther’s days are filled with magazine-related activities, and her nights trying to socialize with her fellow interns, Esther feels disconnected and empty. She just can’t work up the excitement over this opportunity that most girls would give their eye teeth for. Esther is riddled with anxiety and depression. Can she shake out of this funk?

Several incidents occur during Esther’s internship that Plath goes into great detail to describe. Esther talks about the various assignments for “Ladies Day” the interns get to work on as well as the nice swag they all receive (not to mention the horrid food poisoning everyone gets at a luncheon). She also describes Esther trying to befriend her fellow interns like the flirtatious and sociable Doreen and the very pious and naïve Betsy, who Esther is more drawn towards. Esther also reminisces about the various scrapes she gets into when it comes to men, like when a local New York City radio host tries to seduce her, but later he decides to date Doreen. And towards the end of her internship, Esther is nearly raped at a country club party she attends with Doreen. Esther escapes but this causes her to throw out her new clothing and sends her further into despair.

After the internship ends, Esther returns to her childhood home. During this time, Esther is absolutely crushed when another scholarship opportunity, a writing course featuring a well-known author, does not come through. She is not accepted into this prestigious program. Esther tries to fill her time before school resumes in the fall by writing a novel. Yet, she thinks she lacks the life experience to write a proper book. And she also questions what her life will be like after she graduates from college. Up till then, Esther’s whole life has revolved around academics. Will she have a career or will so end up “just a wife and mother” as the fifties often dictated to women back then.

Esther continues to fall into deeper and deeper depression, not being able to sleep or attend to basic activities. She does see a psychiatrist for a while (whom she doesn’t exactly warm up to because she thinks he’s too handsome). And when this psychiatrist suggest electroconvulsive therapy, better known as ECT. The ECT doesn’t work, and Esther makes some half-hearted suicide attempt.

However, she does nearly die after she crawls into a cellar and takes far too many sleeping pills. When her mother can’t find Esther, it is assumed she has been kidnapped and possibly murdered, which the media takes note of. Once discovered, Esther spends time at several mental hospitals, the last one paid for by her college benefactor, the writer who is named Philomena Guinea. It is at this facility, Esther meets Dr. Nolan, a woman therapist, receives questionable treatments including insulin shots, and more ECT. She also meets another patient named Joan, and it is implied Joan is a lesbian who is attracted to Esther. Esther is not fond of Joan at all.

Esther also muses about her old boyfriend, Buddy. Buddy thinks the two might get married someday, but Esther won’t entertain the idea. Esther thinks Buddy is a hypocrite because he lost his virginity to another woman instead of staying pure for Esther. It is also found out that Joan also dated buddy (even though she may be heavily closeted).

During her sessions with Dr. Nolan, Esther bemoans the life women back then must lead and she wants to have the same freedom men have, which includes everything from having sex (Dr. Nolan suggest Esther be fitted with a diaphragm), and to have a full life outside of total domesticity. And as the The Bell Jar ends, Buddy visits Esther and wonders if he’s the cause of both Esther and Joan going crazy and ended up hospitalized. Perhaps he did have a part in it, but who cares? Esther is relieved when Buddy decides to end their non-engagement. Now she is free to really live.

While reading The Bell Jar, I could understand why it was so groundbreaking when it was published in 1963. It portrayed a young woman who had ambition beyond getting married and having oodles of children. It’s wonderful Esther is smart and has goals her life that don’t necessarily include marriage and motherhood solely. And as someone who has dealt with mental health issues, I appreciate a novel that spoke of one woman’s struggle and her fight to remedy herself.

However, in 2024, The Bell Jar just cuts different. For one thing, there is a lot of racism in this book. Esther talks about the ugliness of Peruvians and Aztecs. She also keeps referring to a Black orderly at the mental hospital as the Negro. He is never given a name or just referred to his profession as an orderly. Plus, I found Esther to be rather insufferable to the other women in the book whether it was her mother (who struggled greatly to raise her without Esther’s father) or looking down on a woman in the neighborhood who is raising a large brood of children.

Still, I do think The Bell Jar is an important work. Just keep in mind how things have changed since the fifties when it takes place, and in 1963, when it was published. And be grateful things have changed for women in the past sixty years…or have they? Hmm.

Book Review: Until September by Harker Jones

The staid 1950s are rapidly evolving into the upheaval of the 1960s. Kyle Ryan Quinn is 18 years old. And before he matriculates at Princeton, he’s spending the summer after his senior year in high school at his family’s island vacation home. Kyle’s close friends are also with him. His friends are experimenting with drugs and sex, and those things are opening up, Kyle is holding onto a deep secret. Kyle is gay.

Kyle then meets Jack Averill. Jack is reserved and bookish and beautiful. Kyle is instantly smitten. And when these two privileged young men finally meet, they strike up a quick friendship. They fall in love and their ardor cannot be extinguished.

Kyle and Jack’s love affair is quite passionate and yes, clandestine. They can’t let anyone know about their relationship. Even though people are becoming more open-minded when it comes to sex and sexuality, being gay is still considered something to be ashamed of and hidden.

As Kyle and Jack’s relationship intensifies, they wonder how their friends will react if they find out about the two of them. Kyle’s friends, who he has known since he was a child, have their own issues. One of them impregnates a local girl and convinces her to get an abortion only for this brief interlude to end tragically. And another friends is holding amorous feelings for Kyle.

And then there are Kyle and Jack’s families. How will their parents react if they find out? Kyle’s older brother has recently died and the truth about his relationship with Jack may break his parents’ hearts.

Kyle and Jack are soon found out, and the reaction isn’t positive. And just as soon as Jack has entered Kyle’s life, he disappears. Kyle goes on a mad search seeking out Jack. Will he find him, his true love?

Until September is riveting and written with tenderness and care. You truly feel for Kyle and Jack, and want their love to flourish. Now, I will mention that Until September isn’t written with numbered or titled chapters. Instead, it is written is segments, some several pages long, some only a few paragraphs. At first I found this to be a bit jarring, but after I got into the story it didn’t really matter.

Until September proves that first loves don’t always end in happily ever after, but they are potent, memorable, and shape us forever.

Retro Review: The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe

Before there was such chick lit classics like Valley of the Dolls, Bridget Jones Diary, and Sex and the City, there was Rona Jaffe’s iconic The Best of Everything. Several years ago, I did a retro review of Ms. Jaffe’s book Class Reunion. I decided to revisit the book that launched Jaffe’s writing career back in 1958.

The Best of Everything focuses mostly on several young women living and loving in New York City. They all work in some capacity at Fabian Publishing. Caroline Bender (who might be considered the main character) is a recent graduate from Radcliffe and has just had her heart broken because her fiancé has married another woman. April Morrison is naïve lass hailing from Colorado. Gregg Adams (yes, a woman named Gregg) is an aspiring actress. And Barbara Lamont is a struggling single mother trying to make it after a divorce.

The Best of Everything takes place in the early 1950s. The career women are all career gals, and the men are all cads. The women in the typing pool all try to evade the advances of lecherous Fabian executive Mr. Shalimar. And Caroline especially has to deal with the bitchy and imperious older female editor Amanda Farrow. Remember this is a time where women were just supposed to deal with sexual harassment (long before the #MeToo movement), and there was no idea of a sisterhood in the workplace.

Caroline especially has ambitions that go beyond the typing pool. She starts reading stories sent into Fabian and shows a great deal of potential to be a top notch editor. But Amanda often tries to put a damper on Caroline’s aspirations, and not surprisingly, Amanda also has trouble keeping secretaries. And though Barbara struggles as a single mother, she shows promise as a writer, and is writing columns for a women’s magazine.

But it’s love and romance that are the women’s true calling. Remember, this is the fifties, and a woman’s highest calling with being a wife and a mother. The ladies make there way through the thorny world of dating. Caroline pines for her former fiancé. And even though there are other available men to date, Caroline jumps at the chance when her former fiancé comes back into her life. Is he going to leave his wife for her or is Caroline just going to be some hookup in the big city?

April naively thinks the society man she is dating will marry her when she announces her pregnancy, but instead he takes her to a dodgy abortionist to get rid of it. Barbara desires to get married again, but is leery after going through a divorce. Won’t men think she’s a fallen woman because she’s a divorcee and a single mom? And Gregg becomes obsessed with a producer and begins to stalk him. It doesn’t end very well for her. It seems only the women’s Fabian co-worker, Mary Agnes, has grabbed the the brass ring of true womanhood. She gets married and soon after is blooming with child.

And as The Best of Everything commences, there are no specific happy ending and things aren’t tidily wrapped up in a bow. It leaves you guessing. Will these ladies find love and success in the workplace or is “having it all” a fairy tale? How will these ladies navigate the 1960s? How will they react to the sexual revolution, civil rights, the women’s lib movement, and the Vietnam war? We don’t find out, but we can speculate.

Published 65 years ago, The Best of Everything was quite shocking and risqué. It featured a cast of women characters who desired careers at a time when women were only supposed to desire husbands, babies, and domesticity in the suburbs. Jaffe was brutally honest in her depiction of women in a particular time in big city America. A lot of things have changed since the early fifties for women, and sadly, a lot of people are trying to shove us back to that time. The Best of Everything is a primer on how women are fully-dimensional human beings with desires in the boardroom and the bedroom. The Best of Everything is both timeless and timely.

I Read It So You Don’t Have To: Groupies by Sarah Priscus

“Josie, who’d be covered in blood on the bathroom tiles in nine months.”

This is the opening line to the novel Groupies by Sarah Priscus. And with an opening line like that, a total attention grabber, you would think Groupies would be an amazing read. Sadly, the opening line is the only part of this novel that I liked. From that moment, Groupies went severely downhill.

It’s the late 1970s, and main character, Faun Novak, has dropped out of Mount Holyoke and her mother has just died. Feeling a bit directionless, Faun moves out west to California to live with her high school best friend, Josie. Josie has a fledgling modeling career, and is dating Cal Holiday, the lead singer of the rock band Holiday Sun.

Faun quickly gets caught up in the sex, drugs, and rock and roll of being in Holiday Sun’s orbit. She also fancies herself as some type of photographer even though her “art” consists of taking mostly quick snaps with her Polaroid camera. To make some money to fund her rock and roll habit, Faun gets a job at a mall photo studio, but proves to be too lazy to develop any type of work ethic.

Wanting to be a photographer, you would think Faun would try to hone her skills, buy an actual professional SLR camera, study her craft, and learn how to navigate a dark room (remember this was the 1970s; digital photography was a long way off). But no, Faun would rather wing it with her Polaroid camera and somehow believes her amateurish snaps should be taken seriously by the rock and roll press. I seriously doubt magazines like Rolling Stone, Creem, and Circus would talk Faun seriously. But somehow she is considered a serious artiste by Holiday Sun and the local music scene.

There is a lot of drug taking and mindless casual sex in Groupies, but Josie and Cal seem to be a true blue couple. They even get married. But sadly, Cal is abusive towards Josie. And after Faun releases some photos of Josie in a less than favorable light, it leads towards a violent altercation between Josie and Cal, which is why Josie ends up covered in blood. But is it Josie or Cal who dies?

Who cares? By the time Groupies reaches its climax, I just didn’t care. Groupies is completely shallow and sleazy. It’s as if Priscus only watched Almost Famous a few times, and figured she knew everything about the rock and roll scene in 1970s Los Angeles. Yes, she’s a young author; she just graduated from college. But she should have put more research into writing Groupies. She makes no mention of the rising punk scene, and disco was a brief mention when she name drops Studio 54. Plus, I can assure you there were no Vietnam war protests or women wearing mini-skirts in the late 1970s. Believe me, I was there.

Plus, Faun is a charisma-free character who you can never root for, and she shows no growth throughout the novel. And it’s disgusting how she betrays Josie. Sure, I can understand the rock and roll excess of the 1970s, but it was never conveyed why Holiday Sun was the type of band people wanted to hang out with. They weren’t exactly the Rolling Stones.

In an age where vinyl is making a comeback, Groupies has all the relevance of a dusty 8-track found in the glove compartment of a Ford Pinto.

Retro Review: Sex and the City by Candace Bushnell

When the iconic television show “Sex and the City” premiered on HBO back in 1998, it was groundbreaking. It followed four career women in Manhattan as they traversed the world of love, sex, friendship, and careers. “Sex and the City” made cosmopolitans the must-have drink and gave us terms like “funky spunk,” “frenemy,” and “he’s just not that into you.” Those like me, who live in flyover country, learned about Magnolia cupcakes and the perfect Manolo Blahnik stilettoes. At times, brazen, bawdy, and over the top, “Sex and the City” entertained countless women (and some men-mostly gay). We took quizzes to find out if we were a “Carrie,” “Samantha,” “Miranda” or “Charlotte.” We were either Team Mr. Big or Team Aiden. And maybe if our lives didn’t exactly mirror the dames of “Sex and the City,” we reveled in these ladies’ adventures and adored their girl power friendship. We also salivated of the fashion and the sights of Manhattan.

But before “Sex and the City” was a television show, it was a book, written by The New York Observer columnist, Candace Bushnell. Considering it is the 25th anniversary since “Sex and the City” debuted, and its sequel “And Just Like That” wrapped up its second season, I decided to finally read the book that started it all back in 1996.

Bushnell, who was a glamorous girl-about-town and writer, wrote about the sex lives of people she knew from 1994-1996. In this book, you will find some familiar names-Carrie, Miranda, Samantha, Charlotte, Stanford Blatch, and yes, Mr. Big. However, most of them don’t work in the same careers the characters and after reading Sex and the City, aren’t nearly as compelling as those on the show.

For the most part, the people Bushnell writes about in Sex and the City are rather unlikeable. Sure, on the show Carrie worked my last nerve with her self-absorption and obsession with Mr. Big. But I kept in mind Carrie Bradshaw was just a fictional character. For the most part, I got wrapped up on the story lines of the television show, actually caring about the adventures of Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda. Even when they bugged me, I still was interested in their lives and I adored the friendship among these four women.

But in the book version of Sex and the City everyone is so shallow obsessed with status, materialism, and getting laid. And according to Bushnell, these stories were based on real people in her rarified orbit of wealthy Manhattanites. I didn’t like any of the people she wrote about, and while reading Sex and the City, I wondered how the creators of the TV show give us a program that was a critical and commercial hit and was on HBO for six years. I just couldn’t give a rat’s ass about any of the people Bushnell writes about in Sex and the City. When I wasn’t finding them frivolous and abhorrent (there is a lot of girl-on-girl hate in this book), I was finding them totally forgettable. And I finished the book rather depressed and completely unimpressed. I didn’t find it hilarious and fascinating as the blurbs on the cover claim. I guess I expected more considering I loved the show so much. Perhaps it’s a good thing I never read Sex and the City until now because I’m sure if I did, I would have never watched and enjoyed the show.

Book Review: Mary Jane by Jessica Anya Blau

It is the summer of 1975 and Mary Jane is 14 years old. She lives with her lawyer father and homemaker mother in an upscale Baltimore neighborhood. Shy, naïve, and lacking a huge group of friends, Mary Jane’s life consists of going to her parents upper crust country Waspy country club, attending church services and singing in the choir, listening to Broadway show tunes (rock and roll is verboten), and helping her mother make the nightly dinner. But Mary Jane’s life is about to go through a huge transformation in some major ways in Jessica Anya Blau’s superb novel Mary Jane.

Mary Jane procures a job acting as a nanny for the Dr. and Mrs. Cone’s daughter, Izzy. Because Dr. Cone is a psychiatrist and he and his family live in the neighborhood, Mary Jane’s mother assumes they are the “right people” so she initially has no problems with Mary Jane’s new job.

But the Cones couldn’t be any different the Mary Jane’s family. Whereas Mary Jane has grown up in a household with with rigid ideas and rules, the Cone family is free-spirited, raucous, and quite sloppy. Dr. Cone works from home, and though Mrs. Cone is a homemaker she doesn’t do a whole lot of homemaking. She doesn’t cook, the house is cluttered, and the refrigerator is filled with food that has seen better days. However, Mrs. Cone is kind, friendly, open-minded, and like her husband, clearly loves her daughter, Izzy. The Cone family makes Mary Jane feel completely welcome from the moment she enters their house.

The Cones are about to have some special guests at their house, Jimmy and Sheba. Jimmy is a mega rock star and Sheba is an actress who once had a top-rated TV show. Jimmy is a drug addict, and he and Sheba are hoping Dr. Cone can help Jimmy with his addiction and get back on the right path even though the 1970s was a time of debauchery. Sex, drugs, and rock and roll were truly a thing.

Though Mary Jane is sheltered, she is aware of Jimmy and Sheba and how famous they are. And she’s about to get a glimpse behind the curtain of glitter and glamour that is celebrity. She learns about what it’s like to deal with addiction, the intricacies of marriage (both Jimmy and Sheba’s and the Cones), and how to take care of a rambunctious, precocious, and clingy five-year-old like Izzy.

Mary Jane is also gets more acquainted with rock and roll, and she is even asked to sing along with Jimmy and Sheba, and they are impressed with her vocal talents. Despite being a bit nerdy, everyone is taken by Mary Jane. She brings some semblance of normalcy to the the lives of the Cones and Jimmy and Sheba. Mary Jane is devoted to Izzy. She also is a whiz in the kitchen, using her mom’s recipes to feed everyone.

Mary Jane continues to get an education while working for the Cones. Her world is changing from a strict black and white to a kaleidoscope of color. She begins to realize how rigid her home life is and is appalled over her parents thinly veiled anti-Semitism (Dr. Cone is Jewish) and racism (Mary Jane’s mom flips when her daughter is photographed with the gang at a record store in predominantly black neighborhood and it ends up in the local newspaper).

But Mary Jane also sees that just because Jimmy, Sheba, and the Cones aren’t totally square like her mom and dad doesn’t mean they are perfect as Jimmy falls off the wagon, adulterous acts are committed, and marriages aren’t always “until death do us part.” And maybe Mary Jane’s mother will prove to be not such a stick in the mud after all.

I absolutely loved this book. I found the characters richly drawn and as someone who is of Izzy’s generation, Generation X, I completely recognized the time and place of the mid 1970s, which Blau captures with utter perfection. Mary Jane was a character I rooted for, smart and sensible, but so willing to learn about different worlds. I also appreciated how Blau didn’t turn Mary Jane’s story into a cliché, getting hooked on drugs or getting seduced by either Jimmy or Dr. Cone. Mary Jane is a wonderfully original and entertaining coming-of-age story.

Retro Review: Sex Tips for Girls by Cynthia Heimel

From Jane Austen to Dorothy Parker to Carrie Bradshaw to the sex-drenched pages of Cosmopolitan magazine, women having always been writing about the female predicament when it comes to romance and sex. Whether you’re earning for Mr. Right or navigating a one-night-stand, it’s very likely a woman wrote about these things.

One of these women, was the late Cynthia Heimel. Heimel was born in 1947 and moved to New York City after being raised in Philadelphia. She wrote for publications like The New York Times, New York Magazine, and The Village Voice (she even had a stint at Penthouse). Sure, she was the glamorous girl about town, but she also dealt with divorce and struggles as a single mom, which she wrote about with honesty and humor.

Heimel called herself a feminist, and she proved feminists could be funny, sexy, and love men (though at times she found them perplexing). She regarded us ladies as fully-actualized human beings, not merely just tits, butts, and pussy. Her writing trampled on the tired tropes of women being either pure Madonnas or trashy harlots. Heimel was pretty much one of the coolest dames in the universe.

Heimel came of age during the advent of the Pill, the sexual revolution and second wave feminism. All of these things influences her as a talented and accomplished sexpert/humorist mash-up.

I had read plenty of Heimel’s books back in the 1990s and loved them. I considered Heimel to be the cool as shit auntie I wish I had. Yet, I had never read her iconic 1983 debut Sex Tips for Girls. I was only familiar with it because someone read passages from it at a party I attended ages ago. I decided to dust off and read an ancient copy of Sex Tips for Girls and share my review on what would have been Heimel’s 76th birthday.

In the opening chapter, “Who Are We?,” Heimel questions the state of being a woman in the early 1980s, the Reagan years when many hippies were turning into yuppies and more conserved with corner office than food co-ops and stock options were more important than “sticking it to the Man!” But Heimel’s words due ring true 40 years later. Should we be activists? Should we purse a rich man? Should we eat natural foods?

Other chapters in Sex Tips for Girls cover topics like “The Great Boyfriend Crunch,” Sex and the Single Parent,” “Lingerie Do’s and Don’ts” and “How to Cure a Broken Heart.” None of these topics would look out of place in a women’s magazine or dating manual in 2023. Heimel also offers various sex tips like don’t point and laugh at a gentleman’s penis. For some reason, dudes have a problem with this.

However, there are some parts of the book that need to be left in the 1980s-like totally eschewing condoms. Granted, back in the early 1980s, AIDS was considered a gay man’s disease. It was a few years later, the straights started to take AIDS very seriously. Also, keep in mind, Sex Tips for Girls is aimed at women who are cisgender and straight.

And of course, there have been a lot of changes since Sex Tips for Girls was released 40 years ago. We’ve seen the rise of the internet, social media, and dating apps, all have which influenced the way men and women relate to each other (and it’s not always pretty).

I wish Heimel was still with us. She died in 2018 and according to reports she had dementia. It’s so sad her kick ass brain affected by something so horrific. I would love to get Heimel’s take on the #MeToo movement, a former president who bragged about grabbing women by their genitals, and the odious Moms for Liberty. And what would she think about tradwives and Only Fans, not too mention there are people on the internet who think those are the only two types of women out there, and don’t realize there is a huge group of wonderful women between those two extremes.

So go back in time and read “Sex Tips for Girls” for both the nostalgia and how it relates to sex, relationships and dating in 2023.

Book Review: The Words to Every Song by Liz Moore

Books about the music industry and show business can be tricky. Either an author has to do a lot of heavy research or he or she just tries to wing it, hoping one’s imagination will help fill out the pages of a book. But Liz Moore is a former musician turned writer. So she has a lot of inside knowledge and experience within the rarified world of the music industry and the people who make it tick, which may be why her novel, The Words of Every Song is such an insightful and compelling read.

The Words of Every Song is a collection of short stories that work out as a full novel. All of them intermingle (though many can stand on their own). This book tells the various tales of different people within the confines of the music industry in New York City. There is Jax Powers Kline, a high level executive at Titan Records, and her secretary, Cynthia, a failed musician nursing a broken heart. There is up and coming singer, Lenore Lamont, Cynthia’s former girlfriend who is touted the next big thing. (There’s a giant billboard of Lenore in Time’s Square promoting her soon-to-be released debut album). Tommy Mays is a seasoned rocker finding more solace with his devoted wife and their two daughters. On the other hand, one of his bandmates, Jeffrey, is nearly going insane, living in debauchery, banging underage groupies, and feeling soulless and empty.

Theo is the A & R guy, always on the hunt for the next great thing in music, and he’s hoping the latest band he signed, The Burn, will be the next great thing in music. At the helm of The Burn, is Siobhan, still mourning the death of Kurt Cobain and her late mother, gone too soon. There is Tony, the sound engineer, dealing with bands and musicians who are often too strung out to properly record their music. There is a budding girl group, Hype Girlz, dealing with a member who thinks she’s too fat to be a star and her demanding stage father. And then there is the music fan, Gregory, coming to grips with his homosexuality, believing his life would only be complete if he could meet his favorite rock star, Tommy Mays.

All the stories and the characters interweave seamlessly and come across as very true. Yes, there are clichés of rock and roll excess and corporate dirty tricks, but the characters show layers that make them compelling. Jax, usually in control, finds herself regressing when she visits her parents for her mother’s birthday. And Tommy, despite his jadedness, remains a devoted family man. He’s not sneaking off with giggling groupies. And I really liked the how Moore used the lyrics of various artists-Bruce Springsteen, PJ Harvey, Natalie Merchant, Billie Holiday, and The Cure at the beginning of each chapter.

Whether you’re fan of music and want to learn more about the industry, or just in search of good book, you can’t go wrong with The Words of Every Song.